The World According To Me

So I've been thinking about what to write here for a few days, writing is so cathartic however blogging is so public, I'm not sure what I should do. To respect the parties involved (including myself) I think I'm going to write how I really deeply feel right now somewhere else, not published, the release is just as effective.

The bottom line is that I'm now a single mum to three furry dependants. Another chapter in my life closes, another one starts. Doors closing, water running, fish in the sea, whatever. I'm past the crying now, the wondering, the questioning. I'm not angry anymore, I'm not sad or lost. I just am. The hardest part is to try and get used to the little things about being by myself, the things I took for granted. Making my own morning coffee, remembering to take the bins out, changing "we" to "I".

I spent my weekend revelling in myself. Taking long baths, napping whenever I felt tired, cooking for friends, eating at a fancy restaurant with my family, drinking champagne while people-watching, sitting out in my lovely garden letting the sunlight wash over me, eating chocolate for dinner. All the good things, with the promise of more to come. I have such amazing people around me, and I feel so, so blessed.

I feel neither vindicated or guilty from this whole thing, I'm neither glad or miserable. I don't want to shed any more tears, I just want to get on with it. That's the best thing to do.