The World According To Me

I've had a turd of a morning so I set off shopping in my lunch break to cheer myself up.

My favourite clothing shop has a 20% sale on at the moment, and I'm on their mailing list so I get another 10% discount as well. That's 30% people. THIRTY BLOODY PER-CENT. Do you think I could find anything I liked that fitted me?

Of course I couldn't.

I tried on half the shop, sending one of the lovely girls who works there upstairs to the stock-room every 2 minutes to try and see if there was anything in my size of the items I took a liking to. There wasn't.

So, deflated, I visited a couple of shoe shops. Nada. Being a size 11 anyway, this doesn't particularly surprise me, but why oh why are there only nanna shoes in my size? Horrid clunky bland things, obviously designed to cover the hideousness of my massive, shameful hoofers.

I know that I'm taking it all a bit personally, but with reference to yesterday's post you can understand why. Plus, it's 40-bloody-degrees here today and I'm not cut out for hot weather. I've decided that tonight I'm going to inflate the pool and sit out in the backyard in it with a bottle of champagne and my dog. And maybe some ice-cream for afters.