The World According To Me

Alright kids, I'm not going to do a series of increasingly spaced posts all 'oooooh sorry I haven't updated for so long, I'm so shit, etc etc' as that is boring and egocentric. The truth of the matter is that I have very little material to blog about unless you would like a daily recount of last night's dinner or the funny thing that the dog did this morning. And no-one wants that shit.

In life, as in blog, I am searching for inspiration.

A positive element in my world, I suppose, is that I'm not smoking pot anymore. It's been about 2 weeks now. To clarify, this wasn't a decision I made specifically, more that I have completely smoked my stash and don't know how to procure more. The only people I know who have access are clients and I'm not convinced that it's a good idea to go down that path, no matter how chummy I am with shady characters with drug convictions (or no convictions, if we did a particularly good job). As much as I am struggling with spending my evenings in a lucid state I'm sure my brain will benefit in the long term. Although it is apparent that The Family Guy isn't quite as genius as I originally thought. Devastating.

I have also been having increasing difficulty with my work, drafting submissions for my victims of crime in particular has become laborious and I struggle to find the right turn of phrase, the perfect sequencing, the exact words to evoke the appropriate sympathies without revealing desperation. I have always felt it is imperative that the client retains some dignity in these cases, and not presented to the Court as helpless and ruined unless they are, of course, completely fucked up by the crime. However, I have been engaging in terrible avoidance of these matters and have instead been focusing on punchy, aggressive and arrogant correspondence in my family law files. It is perhaps indicative of my current frame of mind that I am obtaining satisfaction in writing letters which could almost all be summarised simply by saying "No, fuck YOU".

On another work point, I am ostensibly sans-boss at present. And not in a 'I don't really have a boss because my boss doesn't have a clue' sort of way, in an actual 'My boss didn't have a clue so she got the arse' way. I initially felt quite bad that she didn't work out, and I know that I was partly responsible for her departure due to the amount of times I stormed into the Managing Partner's office demanding to know how I was supposed to work with a lawyer who was incapable of writing a coherent file note let alone adequately run a case. However, in the week since she left the office I have encountered scary and poorly concealed examples of what can only be described as gross incompetence, each and every day. To construct a lame analogy, if this practice was a vehicle, we found the handbrake about 5 seconds before crashing into a brick wall doing 100km/h. Not bad for 10 weeks 'work'. So now I have someone coming from another office two days each week to assist/direct/answer my questions, and thank the sweet Lord he knows what he's on about. The remaining days of the working week it is assumed that I will just 'run things' and naturally I am quite delighted that I get extra work and responsibilities not at all commensurate with my qualifications, and best of all - for no extra remuneration! That's right kids, more work, more difficult work and longer hours for no recompense whatsoever! Right on! Luckily, performance reviews aren't all that far away and I will be doing my darnedest to inflict some scrotal trauma by squeezing at that time.

Enough of the whinge. For the sake of balance, I will also say that I am thoroughly enjoying my Monday Night Mixed Netball Comp Season 2007 (Of Hopeful Victory)* of which we have now played four games. At first we had been promoted two entire divisions and consequently got flogged**. Then the organisers realised that although we may sometimes look the part (i.e. wear proper trainers, turn up, etc) we are a tad bit shit and relegated us to a lower division where we have enjoyed two convincing wins and last week I got to play against an extremely attractive man which, pitifully, made my night. Still, I take my joy in whatever form it presents to me these days, ain't nothing gonna break-a my stride.

Also, am going to see Ross Noble rock Shepparton to it's very foundations (comedically) on the weekend which I am very much looking forward to. He and I could have been hair twins if I had never discovered product/straighteners. Plus, he's as random as hell and I love him for this also.

*Unofficial title, obvs
**Technical sporting term